A Team Is Like An Elephant
by LollyMc
Summary: They never forget. However they would be prepare to forgive if Yusuf didn't insist on remaining quite such a terrible driver. Arthur/Yusuf one shot writte for a prompt on the livejournal kink. R&R! x


A Team Is Like An Elephant

"Haha yes exactly! Just like a five-year old on the bumper cars," Ariadne laughed, wiping the tears from her eyes and touching Arthur on the forearm. Yusuf felt a deep stab of jealousy in his gut. The little girl shouldn't be touching what wasn't hers.

"I can drive better pissed!" Eames slurred from the corner of the room, gesticulating and in the process sloshing his Screaming Orgasm everywhere.

"It would have been much neater if I had paid a company to invent a self-driving car," a slightly tipsy Saito mumbled from his seat next to the fire.

His comment earned him a disapproving squint from Cobb who didn't want his best chemist annoyed. However no one could tell the difference between this expression and the 'happy squint' so Arthur simply patted Cobb on the back and yelled 'Glad to know you agree!' before chortling away.

"Seriously Yusuf, a crippled chimp would have got us to safety," Arthur glanced in the chemist's direction, eyes sparkling with amusement and something more. Something slightly more lusty...

Yusuf sat there, arms crossed and stony faced, beard practically twitching with fury. It had been two years. Two fucking years! Yet somehow the topic of the chemist's infamous driving skills during the Fischer job always came up. Always. It'd become such a regular thing that Yusuf could actually _sense_ when it was going to happen.

He'd become immune to it. Or so he thought.

James toddled out of his room and sleepily rubbed his eyes.

"Hi Daddy. What are you guys laughing about? You're being pretty loud," he asked quietly.

Eames rushed over and pulled James into a whirling hug (which he regretted when they both ended up on the floor) as Cobb shook his head in disbelief. Eames was always so desperate for the kid to idolise him. He proceeded to whisper into the little boy's ear. James suddenly let out a massive giggle and sat himself on the rug.

"Yeah! That does sound really awful Uncle Yussy, Daddy said I could have done a better job!"

Yusuf was outraged. He shot Cobb a dirty glare before leaving the room. He was NOT going to get harassed by a seven year old. Grabbing his keys he stormed off into the night, only once regretting that he hadn't grabbed Arthur too.

When he woke up Yusuf was more than a little surprised to find himself in a hospital bed surrounded by the entire team, who although looking a bit worse for wear, also appeared to be repressing smirks.

"What happened?" Yusuf asked groggily.

"You were in an accident," Cobb said, attempting to stop the amused squint that was threatening to take over his features.

"Mmm-hmm," Eames added (congratulating himself on his composure, the giggles were intensely hard to fight back), "And don't worry no one's going mention your driving on the Fischer job ever again..."

Arthur snorted but covered it up with a cough. Yusuf was getting more and more suspicious. The point-man was not a snorter.

"Why? You always talk about my dr- that."

"Because," spluttered Ariadne, breaking the spell "this time you managed to crash the car three separate times. Two of which you were unconscious for! You crashed into a freaking bouncy castle!"

And then the whole team were off, laughing like their sides were physically going to split, a manic pack of hyenas simply wetting themselves. A nurse appeared and ushered them crossly away (she didn't believe Saito when he said it was his hospital. Later that week she would be dismissed)

Yusuf covered his face with his hands. He was going to be hearing about this for many years to come.

A Tiny Epilogue.

The story became more and more ridiculous with every telling. But it never got old. Arthur especially loved the unbearably cute expression of embarrassment on Yusuf's face whenever someone brought it up. Which meant it was brought up frequently and sometimes when it was just the two of them alone in bed together.

Those times, the storyline became somewhat smuttier and Yusuf was crashing because he was getting more than a little distracted by his lover and best friend who had magically materialised into the car.

They always re-enacted these versions. Minus the car of course. And plus a bed. Oh and they never forgot to subtract their clothes.

**AN: Written for a prompt on the Inception Livejournal kink and written very quickly. Also I have never written/read/contemplated an Arthur/ Yusuf fic before so apologies for the lack of...chemistry :L I wrote it as gen then added some bits when I realised the prompt was A/Y.**

**Love y'all! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**


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